


monochrome rainbow

by starwreck



Series: jenjaem soulmates [6]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Established Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Fluff, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Soft Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 12:14:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29278284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starwreck/pseuds/starwreck
Summary: In a world where Jaemin sees colours after meeting Jeno but Jeno doesn't.
Relationships: Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Series: jenjaem soulmates [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2100732
Comments: 10
Kudos: 68





	monochrome rainbow

— Monochrome Rainbow

jaemin being able to see colours the first time he met jeno but jeno cant. not until the day a new student moved and since then, jaemin sees no colours.

❤️

Red.

The first time Jaemin catches the little boy's eyes at the young age of seven, he knows. He knows that _yes,_ that boy is his soulmate, which is why he takes the initiative to approach said boy. 

Holding out his chubby little fingers and plastering his prettiest smile despite missing a tooth, Jaemin greets the angel looking boy. Jaemin's reading skills are excellent for his age, having read through the extensive collection of books his mother had given him. 

_Lee Jeno._

A pretty name for a pretty boy.

Angel boy—Jeno shyly reaches out his own hand and Jaemin shakes their hands together before Jeno could pull back.

The moment Jaemin's fingers touched Jeno, his world burst into colours. It's not his first time seeing colours, only losing it in the beginning of the year when his mother had explained to him in detail of the soulmate concept.

_Red._

Jaemin sees all shades of red when he looks at Jeno.

Crimson, scarlet, cherry, apple, ruby and red.

Excitedly, little seven-year-old Jaemin bounces on his heels, leaning forward and taking Jeno's hands in his. 

"Lee Jeno. I am Na Jaemin, your soulmate!"

Seven-year-old Jeno looks back in confusion, eyebrows narrowing but still doesn't dampen any of his good looks.

 _'Does he not see it? Can he see it?'_ Jaemin thinks, puffing out his cheeks.

"My mother says you can see colours again when you meet your soulmate. And I saw mine when I touched your hand! That means we're—" 

"Soulmates?" Jeno says, eyeing their clasped hands together. "Then, I guess it's nice meeting you, Na Jaemin."

The smile on Jaemin's face is insanely bright that while Jeno could not see what Jaemin sees, he smiles along with the younger.

🧡

Orange.

"Does it hurt?"

Jeno gently caresses the small wound cut open on Jaemin's knee. It doesn't seem serious but it also isn't a light injury with blood dribbling down his leg. Jeno tries to wipe the blood with his handkerchief—the one Jaemin (or rather his mother) had bought him as a gift for Christmas last year. 

Jaemin whines at first, not wanting Jeno to use his precious gift on him but the stern look at 9-year-old Jeno tells him there is no objection. Not with Jaemin's knee still bleeding out. 

Jaemin doesn't cry.

He never does.

He doesn't cry despite the tears welling up in his eyes, blinking them away and puffing out his chest in hopes to look brave.

"You don't need to act around me, Nana." Jeno reminds him. "You can cry, you know?"

"But it doesn't." Jaemin replies, swinging his fine leg while the other is propped up on top of Jeno's lap. 

"You're so clumsy. You could have gotten hurt worse."

"But I didn't." Jaemin singsongs and when Jeno looks at him, Jaemin still has his signature grin, the one that he always uses to convince Jeno on everything.

Jeno dabs on his wound quietly, wishing the blood would stop coming out and hoping their parents would appear soon. He doesn't want to make Jaemin walk with an injured knee.

"Jaemin-ah," Jeno calls.

Jaemin hums.

"What's the colour of this handkerchief now?"

Jaemin tilts his head as he scrutinises the green handkerchief soaked in his blood. "Hm, it's a mix of dark brown and grey. It just looks dark. I think it's as you look at it. That colour."

Jaemin made peace with the fact that Jeno can't see colours like he does a while ago. Their art classes told him enough when Jeno couldn't differentiate blue and white. He doesn't find it odd.

Instead, Jaemin smiles. He has hopes that Jeno will be able to see them soon. Maybe it's because Jeno isn't as enamoured as Jaemin is when he first saw him. Yeah, that's exactly it.

Jeno frowns suddenly. "I hate it when you get hurt."

It makes Jaemin's cheek flare and this is one of the times he's glad Jeno can't tell pink from black and white unless he touches Jaemin's warm cheek.

"Getting hurt is inevitable, Jeno. You can get hurt by anything."

"I don't want to see you hurt anymore."

Jaemin lightens up instantly, jerking up to pull Jeno into his arms. "You're so cute, our Jeno is so cute. He's worried over me. That's so cute!"

Jeno doesn't put up much of a fight, letting Jaemin ruffle his hair and squeeze him in his hold.

"I learned a trick from my mother to make the pain go away."

Jaemin pulls away, a curious look on his face. "What is it?"

Jeno chuckles nervously before moving close to plant a chaste peck to Jaemin's cheek. The sweet gesture leaves Jaemin stunned, his doe eyes widened and his mouth slightly ajar.

"Pain pain go away." Jeno mumbles softly as he thumbs on Jaemin's cheek, the exact spot he pressed his lips against.

"It's my knee that's hurting." Jaemin points out dumbly.

Jeno only laughs shyly. "My mother says this trick does wonders."

_Orange._

Jaemin sees orange downing onto Jeno, the sun setting down behind him accentuates his bright laugh, making Jaemin himself feel warm from the sight.

 _The trick works_ , Jaemin thinks once he gets back home and he no longer thinks of the pain but the sweet kiss on his cheek instead.

💛

Yellow.

Jaemin wipes the sweat on his forehead, brushing back his wet hair. Jaemin has been practicing skating in the ice rink for hours and he wonders how it works. Cold sweat. 

The air condition in the ice rink makes his breath come out in puffs and he was mildly amused by it the first time but now, he feels quite annoyed. He's so tired he could lie down in the middle of the ice and sleep.

Glancing at the time displayed on the entrance of the rink, Jaemin frowns slightly. It's been 45 minutes and he hasn't seen Jeno—Jeno who promised to visit him during his practice to give Jaemin motivation. 

Jeno knows how exhausting Jaemin's practice is and _he_ was the one to suggest visiting him in the first place. The frown etches deeper onto his face, thinking Jeno had forgotten all about him now that he's got new friends in his archery team. Jeno has always been talented and he excels in anything he decides to do. 

Being the ace of the team makes him the most popular and widely liked, so Jaemin has to give up some of his Jeno time for Jeno to spend with his other friends. He doesn't regret it at first but the more time he's given up, he feels worse.

Jaemin makes his last lap in the rink before his coach tells him to take five. There's no reason for him to sit so he just leans against the fence, catching his breath and trying to forget Jeno for the next hour. _It's okay,_ he thinks. 

Jeno not stopping by to see him is okay.

Jaemin can live with that.

"Hey there,"

Jaemin doesn't even flinch when he hears a voice behind him as he turns around and his expression visibly brightens up. All his annoyance and anger vanished when he saw Jeno's moon eyed smile. 

"You came!"

Jeno's smile widens, nodding vigorously. "I'm sorry I'm a bit late. My father asked me to go do an errand for him but I rushed here as soon as I could. You're still practising, right?"

Jaemin neutrals back his emotions, pursing his lips. "Yeah, a little over an hour left."

"Alright, I'll wait for you here." 

Jaemin raises an eyebrow at him. "You sure? It's not really...your thing, isn't it? You're going to get bored easily."

"Why would I?" Jeno shrugs. "You're in there."

Jaemin doesn't think such a simple answer could make his heart flutter. 

"I brought extra money today, so let's go and eat snacks after this."

"What about my diet?"

"You and I both know you don't care about your diet. You won't get fat from a little snacking. We can take a jog back home if you want to."

"You make an irresistible offer to decline." Jaemin giggles. "Deal!"

"You look p—"

"Jaemin-ah! Break's over. Let's start again."

Jaemin sighs, body slumping dramatically while Jeno gives him an assuring smile, gesturing him to go.

_Yellow._

Jeno's smile is as blinding as the fluorescent lights in the ice rink and Jaemin thinks nothing could rival his smile—not even the Sun.

"I'll be here when you finish." 

Jaemin goes back with new determination, eyes crinkling confidently as he manages to score his highest record ever.

💚

Green

It's weird.

Jaemin has never seen Jeno act the way he's acting and truthfully, it kind of hurts him to be given the cold shoulder and the constant eye avoiding. On the other hand, Jaemin cannot _not_ see the way Jeno's eyes linger on Jaemin whenever their senior (who has a great liking towards Jaemin) even touches a hair on him.

It's not hard to miss.

So, it's definitely weird.

Why is it that Jeno is looking at him with those eyes? With that expression? With that little frown on his face?

Jaemin never wants to see the look on Jeno's face again but he can't deny the adrenaline he gets from the dangerous glint in Jeno's eyes as he's pulled into a hug by their senior. As Jaemin's cheeks are touched and pinched playfully. As his hair is ruffled lightly.

Jeno snaps.

"You do know it was rude of you to tell hyung to fuck off."

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Jeno,"

"Can you leave me alone for now?"

Jaemin heaves a sigh and envelops Jeno in his arms, tucking his chin into the juncture of Jeno's shoulder and neck.

"I know you don't like being left alone when you're this distraught. You did something wrong and you should apologize but you can do it later, okay?"

Jeno hums, melting into the touch and nuzzling close. It's often that they share hugs and it always feels nice to hug the other. They have almost the same stature, height and build so it feels extra comfortable.

"Do you want to tell me why though?"

"Huh?" Cue Jeno's famous confused sound.

"I might be getting ahead of myself with this but—" Jaemin gulps. "Are you perhaps jealous?"

Jeno stiffens and Jaemin pulls away. "What?"

"Are you? Of hyung?"

"Why...should I?"

"I just thought because you were acting weird and I can't think of any other reason you would do what you did."

"I'm not jealous!" Jeno huffs. "I was just uncomfortable when he touched your shoulder. It was unpleasant when he played with your hair. It didn't feel right when he made kissy faces at you. I mean—who does that? I didn't like seeing you in his arms because I should—" 

They don't say anything as Jeno trails off, as if finally realising what had happened.

"I—"

"Jeno-ya, _you_ touch my shoulder all the time. _You_ play with my hair almost every day. _You_ don't hate it when I make kissy faces at you. _You—Us_ , we had each other in our arms a while ago. What do you think that means?"

"...I'm jealous of Jungwoo hyung?"

"Are you?"

"I am."

_Green._

Jaemin can see the green radiating off Jeno, his aura going from dark green to light green to pastel to mint and back to normal green.

"So I did that because I was jealous of him."

Jaemin hums.

"Because he was touching you."

Jaemin shrugs.

"Does that mean I like you?"

💙

Blue.

Jaemin has stared into Jeno's eyes more than he can count on even when he's given a calculator. He's familiarised himself with Jeno's eyes—the dips and slopes of his eyes, the curve of his eyebrows, the flutter of his long eyelashes, the emotion in his pupils and even the mole under his right eye.

It's telepathy at this rate.

How Jaemin can tell anything just from one look into Jeno's eyes. It helps that Jeno is always so open with him. Leaving himself vulnerable and unguarded in Jaemin's company, trusting the younger with all his heart. It's raw. _Feels_ raw.

Jaemin loves Jeno's eyes.

He likes to think Jeno shares the same sentiment with him. That he's able to tell how Jaemin is with one look too. That Jaemin wears his heart on his sleeves, on his eyes and on the tips of his fingers.

It's _Jaemin_ , he's unexpected yet very predictable. Jeno knows.

It's dim in Jeno's bedroom with the help of the street light casting its ray through the curtain-covered window. It's dim yet Jaemin can see every detail on Jeno's face as clear as it is light outside, or maybe because he already has Jeno memorised, in and out, all sides of him etched into his memory.

It's one of those rare sleepover nights they have at Jeno's house. Usually, Jeno is the one who comes to Jaemin's place but for a change, Jaemin wants to be in Jeno's whole presence—his room, his bed, his pillows, his clothes, his scent, _him_.

It's those days Jaemin misses his best friend and just Jeno. He misses Jeno.

Jaemin thinks he could end the night with them cuddling under the duvet, wrapped in each other's arms and feeling the other's heartbeat as they fall asleep.

It's not one of those nights.

Tonight, he wants to stay up and stare into Jeno's eyes.

And Jeno is more than glad to grant Jaemin's one simple wish. 

"We're entering high school next month."

Jeno hums as response, knowing Jaemin wants to continue talking.

"It feels so surreal now. It's been so many years and we're still together. Can you believe that? You and me. From little brats to rebellious teenagers."

"You're the rebellious one here," Jeno comments, smiling gently. "I'm not the one who dyed his hair accentric pink."

"Hey! It was pretty, okay? You said it looked pretty on me."

"That I did, I guess."

"Meanie. Shut up, I know I'm pretty, you ugly boy."

"Okay." Jeno just smiles.

It should have irked Jaemin but he only feels calm as he watches Jeno blink slowly, lips still curved into his favourite smile.

"We're getting older now, you know? I miss when we were young and dumb and thought that staying up late was cool. I miss us running around the field and playing tag with the tree. I miss studying together with you. Not the studying part though. Just being with you."

"You're talking as if we aren't going to go to the same high school."

"We might end up being in different classes, Jeno! That's like the worst thing that could happen. I can't function without you by my side."

Jeno reaches out his pinky finger in between them. Jaemin hesitantly links their fingers together.

"Do you think you're the only one, huh? I miss you too. All the time. I function well enough without you— _Ow!"_ Jaemin punches his bicep. "But! But...it's never the same without you."

_Blue._

Jeno's eyes seem blue under the dim lighting, bright yet calming and it's all Jaemin ever wants. All Jaemin thinks he could live with for the rest of his life.

Jaemin sees blue in his eyes. 

💜

Indigo.

None of them recall the first time they held hands but their first kiss is as vivid as ever. 

In fact, they've never gone past holding hands and the occasional cheek kisses they share in secret. They do a lot more talking and staring. It's how their relationship is, if you were to put a label on it.

They haven't, though.

Their relationship established after the time Jaemin confronted Jeno on being jealous yet it's been almost four years and Jeno still hasn't acted on it and Jaemin is never the type to push him.

Because at the end, Jaemin found his soulmate. Colours as vibrant as the rainbow.

Yet Jeno's rainbow is still colourless, monochrome. 

Jaemin hasn't lost his hope yet.

They went on for years without a label on them, other than the fact that everyone knows they are each other's person. That Jeno is Jaemin's and Jaemin is Jeno's.

No one questions it anymore.

(Sometimes, Jaemin does, on nights he's insecure and anxious but really, he doesn't turn to anyone about it)

Jaemin knows Jeno loves him, and that's what matters most. They love each other.

Jaemin gets his first kiss on the night of Jeno's 17th birthday. They sneaked out to a convenience store an hour before the clock hit 12 in the morning. Raiding the snack areas and Jaemin making sure he's got all seventeen choco pies and a flimsy match to place it on top of the small pyramid of choco pies. 

They huddle together in the cold night of April, body snug in padded jackets and thick scarves. Hands intertwined together as Jaemin makes a countdown to Jeno's birthday.

They sit down on the quiet playground, plate of choco pies in the middle and Jaemin makes Jeno make his wish.

"You should close your eyes too."

"Why should I? It's your birthday, not mine, mister."

"Come on," Jeno whines and it doesn't take long for him to persuade Jaemin because Jaemin is weak for Jeno, as always.

Jaemin slips his eyes shut, his hand warm in Jeno's own hand and despite not being his birthday, Jaemin wishes Jeno the happiest birthday and a long life. 

Jaemin isn't sure when to open his eyes but he doesn't need it when he hears rustling of clothes and the next thing he knows, something soft meets his lips.

Startled, Jaemin's eyes flutter open midway before falling into rhythm in the kiss. _His_ first kiss. _Their_ first kiss. It's clumsy and awkward and just nervous presses of their lips. 

"I got my wish."

Jaemin blushes pink and he thanks the playground for being dark enough to hide them but it's not like Jeno can see the colour of his cheeks.

Feeling confident, Jaemin inches closer until their noses brush. "You have more wishes."

Jeno grins, eyes boring intently into Jaemin's as he leans back in, meeting the other's lips in a languid, softer kiss. They get immersed into the kiss immediately, lips pressing urgently and breath mingling together.

It's a first kiss never to be forgotten.

_Indigo._

Their kiss is perfect and very Jeno-Jaemin like. They pour their hearts into the kiss, adding up another one and another one and another one until they lose count. Until the only thing they remember is the taste and shape of each other's lips.

💖

Violet.

It's not the first time Jeno can see a glimpse of colours. At peak times of his happiness or deepest of his emotions, Jeno is able to catch glimpses of said colours. The colours Jaemin never fails to tell him about. The colours he could never see before. The colours he could only imagine what it would look like.

Jeno sees it every time he's with Jaemin.

It's unsurprising. 

It's _Jaemin._

Everything that happens, happens with Jaemin. Jeno has learned that through the best way. 

Jeno has seen how red looks like when they touch. When they go further than just an innocent touch. When everything gets so blurry that his senses are overwhelmed.

Jeno has seen how orange looks like when Jaemin laughs, unadulterated, sincere and bright. When his eyes crinkle and his he could hear the sharp inhales of his giggles.

Jeno has seen how yellow looks like when Jaemin smiles his way. When Jaemin smiles at Jeno and him only. When his attention is centered at him and no one else. _Nothing could rival Jaemin's smile,_ Jeno thinks.

Jeno has seen how green looks like when he sees people looking Jaemin's way not in the way he wants them to. They see him the way Jeno sees him. _Only_ Jeno can see him that way. It leaves him protective and a little clingier.

Jeno has seen how blue looks like when Jaemin stares at him wordlessly. Eyes wide and sparkly. Untainted and so, so pure. Even when Jeno taints him with his touch and Jaemin cries out, everything is blue with Jaemin.

Jeno has seen how indigo looks like whenever their lips touch, innocently and not so innocently. When they reach places too personal, too private and behind everyone's eyes.

Jeno has seen how violet looks like. His love for Jaemin. It's violet. Vibrant, lively and electrifying. It's mysterious with a sprinkle of fondness and love in it. 

_Violet._

The first time Jaemin tells Jeno he loves him. And the first time Jeno whispers back he loves Jaemin too.

It's a pretty shade of violet in the colour of _love._

They have each other and Jaemin can lead Jeno through his life, bursting his black and white life with colours. Jeno thinks he can live like this the rest of his life. With Jaemin.

🖤

Grey.

Jaemin has never seen Jeno cry and the times Jaemin has cried, he knows Jeno never sees the colours. It's painful. Grey is a plainly beautiful colour.

Jaemin thought he would never ever get to see grey, not if he's with Jeno for the rest of his days. Until they grow old and wrinkly. Until their hair turns white and _grey._

It's not like the thought never crossed his mind. It has, many times. 

And the nightmare of his dreams begrudgingly comes true in the form of a transfer student in their senior year of high school. Transfer students in senior years are always peculiar, different and very much unusual. No one ever wants to move in the middle of the semester.

Yet this new student.

Bright red, fresh orange, vibrant yellow, tender green, lush blue, cool indigo and striking violet. 

He's all in one.

Jaemin doesn't know why he's paying so much attention to the new student. Not until he's asked to sit down.

Not until he seats beside Jeno. Not until he turns to Jeno and smiles. Not until he offers a hand to Jeno.

Not until Jaemin's rainbow life fades into the colourless rainbow he hasn't seen after he met Jeno.

It was too much for Jaemin to hold it in class. The shocking discovery and the fact that Jeno's first reaction is to turn back to look at Jaemin at the corner of the class, head down on the desk.

 _Jeno can see colours,_ Jaemin thinks. _That's his soulmate. His. Not me. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not—_

Jaemin manages to not sob and bawl out in class as he asks permission to go to the toilet. He runs, runs and runs until his legs give out. Until he falls down and scrapes his knees. Until the tears finally escape.

Jeno doesn't follow after him.

🤍

Monochrome.

Jaemin knows this would happen sooner or later. He should have expected his happiness would never last long. Not when all the hints of Jeno having a whole soulmate has always been the elephant in the room. Jaemin should have known better that his happiness can be taken right under his fingertips because it wasn't meant to be his, not in the first place.

Yet, as the years go, the chances of it slimmed down and Jaemin is content with his life, together with Jeno as the way Jeno is. Jeno made sure to make Jaemin know and understand this.

Despite not being actual soulmates, Jaemin thinks no one can be on par as Jeno is to him. The way Jeno responds to him with all his attention, the way Jeno stares at him silently as if understanding everything and the way Jeno makes Jaemin feel he's the only one he would ever want.

Jaemin was.

He still is.

Growing up forgetting what colours are and learning them back with the help of Jaemin's presence in his life, Jeno could never ask for more. His life is perfect.

He doesn't think he needs the ability to see colours when he has Jaemin by his side. He doesn't need it because Jaemin is his everything. He's grown to love Jaemin and all the imperfections of his own life. 

Jeno knows how much it hurts Jaemin whenever he confesses during their pillow talk about being pathetic since he's the only one who can see colours while Jeno is stuck in a monochrome world. A black and white world.

But Jaemin doesn't know, in the middle of Jeno's black and white world, Jaemin is the only variable in rainbow. The only one vibrant in the mess of plain colours. The one that lit up Jeno's life, even by a bit.

And Jeno never got to tell Jaemin this.

The moment Jeno's hand touches the new student, his life bursted into a palette of colours. It was beautiful. To finally see what the world looked like with its colours and shades.

The first thought in his mind is— _Jaemin_. 

Jeno turns back to look at Jaemin, trying to spot him in his now colourful world. He tries to find Jaemin's pretty features and bright smile but instead he sees the younger with his head down on his desk. 

_No. Nononono—_

Before Jeno could react, Jaemin is already leaving the class. His heart churns awfully painful, especially after Jeno sees the tears in Jaemin's eyes. Jeno clutches onto his chest— _It hurts._

Jeno hears the new student calling out for him but he could care less. The noise blending in into one with his teacher's voice as it turns static to his ears. Jeno yelps in pain, body bending over as he holds onto his head. 

Everything hurts. He can't focus. He needs to find Jaemin. He needs him. He can't hear. He can't see. All the colours mix together, turning his sight a mess. The presence of his supposed soulmate makes it worse. He can't stand it.

Thankfully, his teacher excuses him to the infirmary and Jeno calms himself down first. He can't look for Jaemin in his state now. He doesn't know how long he stays on the bed, zoning out at the white ceiling. 

His eyes are empty, reflecting the state of his heart.

A sudden movement from beside him surprises him, brain moving faster to utter out the first name—

"Nana—"

"Ah, sorry. I'm not—Nana? I was worried about you earlier. You seemed like you were in much pain."

Jeno's expression falls the instant his eyes recognise who it is in front of him. Any other sane person would get hurt by the look in Jeno's eyes, especially one coming from a soulmate but the new student barely spares him another look.

"It doesn't look like you're hurt much."

"I'm not."

"Can I—Is this rude to ask a stranger? Well, you're my classmate, so technically not a stranger." He rambles. "You...you saw it too, didn't you?"

Jeno clenches his jaw, unwilling to answer the question. He doesn't want to lie but he doesn't want to admit it either. 

"The silence signals a yes, I guess. So...you're my soulmate, huh?"

Jeno sends him a cold look, the coldest he's ever given someone. Ever since his life is full of Jaemin, he hasn't looked someone else's way with the same fondness in his eyes for Jaemin.

He doesn't think he can do the same for this person...his soulmate.

Unexpectedly, his soulmate cocks a smug eyebrow at Jeno, arms crossed against his chest unimpressed.

"I'll let you go since it's your first time seeing colours—"

"It's not." Jeno replies bluntly.

The other looks pleasantly surprised but covers up quickly with a smirk. "I'll let you go this time, _soulmate_ but just so you know, I don't want you. And clearly, you don't want me either. You can thank me for being able to see colours. You're welcome. From this point on, let's treat each other as strangers, okay? Okay."

"W-wait, what?"

His soulmate clicks his tongue disappointedly. "And here I thought you were decently smart. Listen here, what's your name, dude?" He checks Jeno's name tag. "Lee Jeno, is it? Okay, I don't care that we're soulmates and judging by your cold shoulder, you hate it too. So, let's call it cool. We don't expect anything from each other. We don't want each other. Go on with your life, okay? Okay."

Jeno still looks confused, lips frowning slightly.

"Want context? I have a college boyfriend, dude. He's like everything and all I ever wanted and hell no will I give up on him because I met my soulmate or whatever. It's not like we have to fall in love or something, so let's just go on our own ways. Me with my hot, sexy boyfriend and you...with yours."

Jeno scoffs.

"If you do have one, I mean—"

"I do." Jeno grits his teeth. "And he's the prettiest boy ever."

"Yeah? I didn't need to know. Go wax poetry to him instead. Well, my job here is done. Let's be...decent friends after this. I don't really want to end up being enemies with my soulmate."

Jeno is left with no choice but to agree when the other walks himself out. Jeno belatedly realises he still doesn't know his soulmate's name but he deems it not important for now.

🤍

Jeno gets a worried text from Jaemin’s mother asking if he knows where her son is. It’s almost midnight and Jaemin is never the type to leave the house without informing his mother. He loves her too much to let her worry over him but Jeno can’t help but think it’s his fault that Jaemin is not at home.

Had he caught him earlier and told him how he feels.

Had he convinced Jaemin he doesn’t need any soulmate when he has Jaemin. 

Jeno should have contacted Jaemin earlier instead of leaving him be because he doesn't want to upset his lover any more than he already is but he really should have at least asked his mother. 

At the end of the day, Jaemin will always be the one person Jeno will ever look at, will ever love. His soulmate was never in the picture and he is not, will never be.

Jeno’s first instinct is to look for him at the places near the neighbourhood. He searches high and low for his boyfriend, accompanied by the dark night and beaming light from the street lamps. 

Sweat drips down his temple and Jeno wipes them carelessly. He's been running around for twenty minutes and he doesn't think he'll survive another ten minutes _and_ not find Jaemin.

Jeno is more than sure Jaemin is able to take care of himself, the boy being as strong as him but he's Jaemin, _his_ Jaemin and he can:t bear the thought of Jaemin getting hurt. At least, not physically for now.

As Jeno runs out of places to search and his mind is already a jumbled mess, he sees the kids' playground— _their_ playground. Jeno hasn't searched this place yet so he heads there.

Panting heavily, Jeno eyes the quiet and dark playground with both hands on his knees as he tries to catch his breath. His breath hitches when he sees the familiar backpack placed beside the slide.

With soundless steps, Jeno approaches the slide and a relieved sigh leaves his lips when he finally sees who he's been looking for.

"A little quicker than I thought you'd find me."

Jeno isn't surprised Jaemin could tell it was him. They just work like that all the time. Maybe they picked it up since they were young or maybe they're just really meant to be.

"C'mon sit down." Jaemin says, turning slightly and Jeno is pleasantly surprised he doesn't look like a mess or anything he thought Jaemin would be after being gone for hours.

Jeno hesitantly sits down, leaving a little gap between them in case Jaemin doesn't want to be too close to him.

Jaemin eyes the space and chuckles, moving close until their shoulders touch. "There. better."

"Jaemin—"

Jaemin suddenly leans his head on Jeno's shoulder, turning the other speechless and body tense at first. Jeno instantly relaxes, letting his own head lean against Jaemin's.

"You're sweating."

"Huh? Yeah, I've been looking for you for awhile now. You got your mother really worried."

Jaemin sighs. "I forgot to tell her before my phone died. Can you text her I'm okay?"

Jeno hums, taking out his phone and sending a reassuring text to Jaemin's mother. It doesn't feel like Jaemin is going to go back any soon.

"Jeno-ya,"

"Yeah?"

"How is it?"

"What is?"

"The world in colours. Can you see the colour of the moon now? And this hideous slide? Or my backpack? Our school uniform?"

Jeno bites down on his tongue. "They're... pretty. It's fascinating."

Jaemin shifts his head to stare at Jeno's side profile. "You don't seem excited? C'mon Jen. It's the first time you're able to see colours!"

"I don't really care whether I do or not." Jeno pecks a kiss to Jaemin's forehead. "I've never really cared."

"But—" Jaemin sits back, eyes focused on the ground. "You finally can see colours. You even met your s-soulmate…"

"I guess I did."

"I wanted tonight to be our last date—"

"What do you mean last date? Jaemin, I—"

"Jeno, no. I can't do that to you and your soulmate. I can't take what's supposed to be theirs and you—you should accept them. You never know how long they might have been waiting for you."

Jeno sighs, cupping Jaemin's cheeks and making them face each other but Jaemin averts his eyes. "Jaemin, please. You can't decide this by yourself, baby."

"Jeno-ya, in all my life, I've never learned how to love. You've been there for me right from the start so I can't tell what our love is like. I know your feelings for me are real and as genuine as mine. I always told you how it never bothers me that when I could see colours, you couldn't. That was a lie to convince myself I really wasn't bothered but honestly, how do you expect someone to react? I keep on thinking that you will find your soulmate one day and then I'll be alone."

Jaemin clenches his jaw. "I d-don't wanna be alone. Not without you. How can I unlove you when that is the only thing I've known how to do?"

"Do you really not want to listen to me?"

"If you're going to break my heart by outright saying the truth, then I'd rather you don't say anything and let me be in this bubble until the sun rises."

Jeno lets out a bitter chuckle, one hand moving to pull Jaemin close by his neck and he knocks their foreheads together. 

"You idiot. You think you're the only person who feels that way?" Jeno frowns. "Why would I even leave you? The thought has never crossed my mind. I couldn't possibly leave my best friend, my lover, my partner, _my soulmate_ —and before you say more, I don't think of anyone else as my soulmate. You are the one and only soulmate I have. It doesn't matter if I can see colours or black and white, none of that matters. What matters to me is you."

A silence envelopes them, Jaemin looking at Jeno, unblinking.

"So…" Jaemin starts. "You don't want to leave me?'

Jeno chuckles dryly. "No, idiot."

"And you don't care about colours?"

"Nope."

"B-but—what about your soulmate? He—"

"He's happily in love in a relationship with a hot, sexy college student. His words, not mine."

Jaemin still looks like he can't believe what Jeno had confessed, finding the information a little hard to process this late at night.

"You want to stay with me? You love me? You don't care if you can see colours? Because now, I can't see anything and everything feels so grey. It's not bad and I thought I could get used to this when you go back to your soulmate because Jeno, you deserve the best. I've been living all my life seeing colours and I think it's okay if I can't see them anymore—"

Jeno feels his heart ache at every word Jaemin says, the younger's expression glooming even more, so he pulls Jaemin by the neck and smashes their lips together.

"You talk way too much." Jeno gasps.

"That—I—"

Jeno kisses him again.

"W-wait wait, Jeno. Hey!" Jaemin pushes him off, looking alarmed and heavy pants leave his mouth. "Wha—Jeno!" He cups Jeno's face and stares into his eyes, his own eyes sparkling under the moonlight.

"What?"

"Kiss me again."

Jeno complies, because he truly does love kissing Jaemin. It's one of his favourite things to do. 

"Tell me what colour your shoes are."

"My shoes—what?" Jeno takes a glance at his shoes and groans out loud, he was in a hurry so he didn't realise the mismatched shoes. 

"Blue and green."

"Green and blue."

🤍

"So, what's your soulmate's name? I didn't really catch it earlier."

"Uh—" Jeno scratches his head awkwardly. "I don't know either. I didn't get to ask."

"What?" 

"It doesn't matter. I feel like we'll stick together for a long time though. He's rather...determined."

"Are you going to introduce me as your boyfriend?"

"My best friend, my boyfriend, my soulmate, my love, my everything."


End file.
